The one OS to rul them all
Recently one of my friends, a computer wizard, paid me a visit. As we
were talking I mentioned that I had recently installed Windows on my PC,
I told him how happy I was with this operating system and showed him the
Windows CD. Too my astonishment and distress he threw it into my
micro-wave oven and turned it on. I was upset because the CD had become
precious to me, but he said: 'Do not worry, it is unharmed.' After a few
minutes he took the CD out, gave it to me and said: 'Take a close look at
it.' To my surprise the CD was quite cold and it seemed to have become
thicker and heavier than before. At first I could not see anything, but
on the inner edge of the central hole I saw an inscription, in lines
finer than anything I have ever seen before. The inscription shone
piercingly bright, and yet remote, as if out of a great depth:
4F6E65204F5320746F2072756C65207468656D20616C6C2C204F6E65204F5320746F
2066696E64207468656D2C0D0A4F6E65204F5320746F206272696E67207468656D20
616C6C20616E6420696E20746865206461726B6E6573732062696E64207468656D
'I cannot read the fiery letters,' I said.
'No,' he said, 'but I can. The letters are Hex, of an ancient mode, but
the language is that of Microsoft, which I shall not utter here. But in
common English this is what it says:'
One OS to rule them all, One OS to find them,
One OS to bring them all and in the darkness bind them |
Jaberwocky Parrodie
Andy Sachen and Seth Clasby
'Twas billing and the slimy toads
Did fire and stumble in the mud:
All flimsy was the oversized nose,
And the sofas went thud!
"Beware the Somethingy my son,
The stuff that fights, the things that might,
Beware chubby Pencil and shun,
The brightness of the Night."
He took his stereo sword in hand,
Long time the oddly-shapted foe he saught,
So rested he by the bummy tree,
And stood awhile in thought.
And as in thinking thought he stood,
The Somethingy with ears of shame,
Came sniffiling through the bulgy wood,
And gargled as it came.
One, Two! Three, Four! And I cannot count more,
The stereo sword went clickity-clack,
He left its head, and with it dead,
He went barrumphing back.
"And hast thou slain the Somethingy,
Come to my arms, my foolish boy
Oh hideous day. Boohoo, er... Hooray"
He confused himself in his joy.
'Twas billing and the slimy toads
Did fire and stumble in the mud:
All flimsy was the oversized nose,
And the sofas went thud!
Beware the Hugmewalk my thing
the arms that hug the mouth sais hug me
Beware his tuki bird my thing who shuts the freezer door.
Alas in turkish delight he stould the Hugmewalk
with arms of flame 'came rumbling through the freezer door
And melted as it came
He took his ibook in his hand
'Long time a good computer he sought
I will never switch from a mac to pc
his stomach rumbled then
'Twas Scooby and the Mystery gang
Did find the Hugmewalk
All frozen was the hugmewalk after they were done with him
all fozen were his oversize toes witch did not stink ao bad anymore.
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